Living Silently Under Oppression For Years, Only To Be Blamed

I’m Nia, a 20 year old student living in Austria, at least for now. I was born to a religious and oppressive family in Syria, and lived there for most of my life.

As a kid, I always silently criticized my family’s beliefs and lifestyles, but as a dependent person, I loudly agreed with everything they did and told me to do.

Only after my move to Vienna, Austria, did I start to be more open about myself. Now, I could never face my family and out my atheism or my free lifestyle and sexuality, but I knew they had less control of me in a country where the law and constitution is actually applied.

Shortly after moving, I was repeatedly sexually assaulted by my sponsor in Austria. I had once again found my life in someone else’s hand, with the danger of facing one of two devils.

I stayed there legally for two years before I, once again, tried to free myself of someone’s power. I did, only to find myself in a bigger problem. Officially documents in Austria and chock-full of bureaucracy. My sponsor had supported all my documents before, and now that I cut him out of my life, so did I my legal documents in Vienna.

I now await to ask the authorities to keep me here as an asylum seeker, and hope that they do not send me to my family, or more appropriately, my eventual honor killing.

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